


Waves of Willow

by AwkwardPatotee



Series: Azure Boy [2]
Category: Supernatural, destiel - Fandom
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Azure Boy, Charlie Bradbury - Freeform, Comatose Dean, Dean in Heaven, Dean in Hospital, Destiel - Freeform, Feelings, Fluff, Heartbreak, Human Castiel, Hurt Dean Winchester, Jessica Moore - Freeform, M/M, Mary Winchester - Freeform, POV Castiel, POV Dean, POV Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester - Freeform, Sick Dean Winchester, Soulmates Castiel & Dean Winchester, Supernatural - Freeform, Wayward Sons - Freeform, Winchester - Freeform, author!Cas, destiel au
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-08-20
Updated: 2016-10-05
Packaged: 2018-08-09 23:01:03
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 6,642
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7820626
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AwkwardPatotee/pseuds/AwkwardPatotee
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>ON HIATUS</p><p>Dean is in a coma after an accident in the impala and Castiel is now trying to do everything he can to keep his hopes up but, unfortunately life has a way of getting in the way.<br/>And, as Cas is spending more and more time in the hospital he also gets to know Dean's new doctor which leads to mistakes and regret.<br/>While all this is happening, Dean himself gets a little carried away with the Land of the Dreams and starts to lose his grip on reality. </p><p>**A lot of angst and feelings are hidden in this story and if you keep reading I will not have any responsibility for what happens after you're done reading.</p><p>***This is part 2 of the series "Azure Boy" so if you haven't read the first one yet, I would recommend you do that first.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Anniversary...

 

**Christmas Morning. A year after the accident**

Castiel opened the front door and stepped in to the dirty smelling entrance. He would need to clean soon, he thought as he threw off his boots and hung his coat on the coat rack.

He felt comfy in his big sweater and fuzzy socks, but when he looked out of the window, a shiver went down his spine. Small white snowflakes had started to rise on top of the window ledge. The whole town had already started to take off the Christmas decoration and put up New Year’s ads. Just on the way home Castiel had heard four people complain about the snow coming too late. 

Castiel sat down on the couch in the almost empty living room. It was a small apartment, but he’d had it for about three years so he felt at home here. From where he sat, Cas could see Dean’s leather jacket hanging besides his own. It brought a small but melancholic smile to his lips. It felt so strange. A whole year had gone by and Cas hadn’t even noticed. One day had just taken the next and Cas had never gotten the time to look back to see if something was missing. Of course, he didn’t have to look back to feel how much he was missing Dean, but besides that it felt as if he’d forgotten some part of himself along the way as well. 

Castiel grabbed his phone in his pocket and checked the time. If he was quick, he could be in the hospital thirty minutes before the others would come. Sam, Jess and Mary had all told Cas that they would be there about half past three and then, they all could go back to Sam and Jess’ new place. They had excitingly told Castiel, that they were expecting a little girl when they told him why they bought a new apartment. 

Castiel was happy that they all had managed to cope with Dean’s accident in a reasonable way, but in that way he also felt a bit left out. He didn’t feel like he could get over it the way they did. He needed time – and apparently a lot of it – to even feel just a bit like himself again. But, no matter what he tried he didn’t have that special ‘alive’ feeling which he had had before.

Cas arrived at the hospital and said hello to several doctors whom he’d gotten to know over the time. Some of them smiled at him and said a cheery hello, others looked at him like he was the sick one; eyes full of pity. That kind of look always gave him a special knot in his stomach and he wanted to punch those expressions right off the person’s faces. Of course, they were doctors so he couldn’t just punch them. 

He arrived at the same door as he’d seen at least once a day for the least year and took a deep breath. He always felt like he had to get all of his negativity out of his system before he entered Dean’s room. Like, his negative thoughts actually would make Dean feel worse. A clean smell hit him when he opened the door and stepped inside. The first thing his eyes saw, was the window. From that Cas could look at right at the parking lot – he had often found himself observe what kind of people arrived and left. Repeatedly his thoughts had came to wonder if that would ever be him and Dean leaving the hospital. If they’d ever get that far. 

The second thing his eyes landed on was Dean. He was laying down looking so peaceful. The monitor beside his bed came with a monotone beeping sound, which Cas had found being really comforting actually. Usually when he couldn’t sleep he drove to the hospital just to find some kind of closure. And, when he looked at that monitor it felt like he was looking at Dean’s life, his heart. If Dean would wake up one day, the first thing Castiel would ask him was if Dean had any thoughts or dreams while being asleep. He wanted to know if Dean was still in there or if it really was too late. 

Cas walked over to the side of Deans bed and looked at his closed eyelids. Gently he took Deans hand and started drawing small circles with his thumb. 

“So, big news. I got the big yes I’ve been waiting for” Cas mumbled. A small whole in his chest always formed when he looked at Dean lying there, not moving a single muscle. But, Castiel knew that it would feel much more horrible if he stayed away. 

“They want me to write another book. I still can’t believe the first one actually sold some copies” he smiled to himself. He was proud of his accomplishments but again, he wanted Dean to be there and celebrate with him. Cas was quick to change the subject and his thoughts, and started talking about how his day had been and what he had been up to. Then he started rambling about how crazy it was that it was more than a year ago they first met. 

Castiel didn’t know if he should be sad or grateful. He couldn’t stop thinking what if; what if Dean had never gone in to coma and instead they had celebrated their first anniversary together. Or, what if Dean had actually died – how would the world be for Cas now? He would never know. Castiel didn’t often think about this stuff. Mostly for the whole year, he had tried to just be there for Dean and when his book then started selling, he got busy with creating a sequel; therefore, he had never had the time to actually think about this stuff. Of course, he had felt absolutely devastated in the beginning but for some reasons, he had started to shut those feelings off and shove them back in to his sub consciousness. And, it was first now at this time of the year he started to realize how bad he really felt about it. 

The door to Dean’s room opened and stopped all of Castiel’s endless thoughts. Jess, Sam and Mary came through the door, all wearing the same mask expressing both bliss and sorrow. Bliss at the sight of Castiel and sorrow at the sight of Dean. Cas got up from the chair and received a hug from all of them before the room went quiet again. They all looked at Dean. The room was so quiet that Mary almost whispered when she asked Castiel:

“Any changes?” her voice was neutral but had an almost hidden undertone of hope.  
Castiel looked in her eyes and shook his head. They had done this routine almost every time they met up and still, Cas could sense the disappointment Mary felt, which she tried to cover up as much as possible. 

They stayed at the hospital for about an hour before they started to get hungry. Jess and Sam had already prepared dinner for them all, so they were quick to get their coats on and leave the room, when the talk came to the subject of foods. Castiel pulled a mine of impression when he saw Sam and Jess’ new place. It was much bigger than the old apartment they had lived in before. If only Dean could see how great his little brother was doing. 

The talk seemed to flow immediately at the dinner table. Mary couldn’t help but start off the conversation with the topic on their upcoming member of the family. They all smiled and laughed and Cas couldn’t be more grateful that this family had taken him in as one of their own even though they had only known him for about a week when the accident happened. They all had just seemed to connect instantly. 

“Oh my! Jess, it’s gorgeous!” Mary exclaimed when she saw the little pink jumper Sam and Jess had bought for their future daughter. Jess gazed upon it with a proud expression.  
“I can’t wait to see her face,” she said and caressed her tummy even though it was still just a small bump. If Castiel didn’t know that she was pregnant he wouldn’t be able to figure out that she actually was. 

A buzzing came from Castiel’s phone and as he excused himself out of the room and into the hallway, he checked who was calling him. A small thought always made him believe that it was the hospital calling, ready to tell him that Dean had finally… But, he always got the same disappointed feeling in his gut. This time it was Charlie calling and he wrinkled his brows in confusion. 

“Hello?” he asked, when he answered the call.

“Hey stranger! Long time huh,” the familiar voice said. “I just wanted to say a belated merry Christmas and let you know that I am coming to California next week!” 

“Really? Why?” Castiel asked, hoping they’d find a time to meet. It had been too long since they had last seen each other. 

“Because I’m finally getting the time off I deserve,” she explained. “So I thought maybe we could find a place to hang out or something?” she asked, and Castiel could almost see the small smile on her lips. 

“Yeah, that’d be great” Cas answered, also wearing a tiny smile. 

“Nice, I’ll let you know when I know some more about when I’m arriving” Cas was just about to answer when Charlie went ahead of him. “Hey, what’s up with the books by the way?” she asked. 

“How did you already know about that?” Cas answered her question with another question. 

“I have contacts,” she answered and Cas would bet that she was smiling sneaky to herself. 

“Oh do you now?” Cas answered, trying to sound sarcastic. “Why don’t we find a time to meet up and I’ll tell you everything about it?” of course he knew that he failed at the sarcastic thing, so he tried to just be casual instead. 

“Sounds great!” she said before hanging up and leaving Castiel alone on the hallway, smiling to himself. Maybe he could manage to pull through another year after all…


	2. Ladybug

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry about the wait, but I'm just trying to work more on the chapters and their length and not how fast I can post them, so please be patient.  
> Tell me what you think - it would really help!
> 
> And thanks for all the kudos already <3

**Summer 1991**

The room was completely quiet. The curtains were lazily swinging in the few cold breezes as the fan made round after round with its wings, hanging from the ceiling. The air was humid and all clothing covering more than shoulders and knees were forbidden thoughts. The apartment was small; so small that Dean had to carefully make breakfast for Sam, while John was laying and snoring on the couch. It was about eleven in the morning and Sam was starving. He had begged Dean for some breakfast in over an hour before Dean finally rolled out of bed and stumbled in to the kitchen. Dean knew that John would get furious if he broke anything, which was also the reason for Dean to be so careful. For sure John would be pissed if Dean accidentally woke him up, but if Dean on top of that had broken something, he might as well sleep in the streets for the rest of the weekend. 

Dean scraped off the scrambled eggs from the pan and onto a plate. He added a splash of ketchup and hoped that was good enough for his little brother. As hoped, Sam hungrily accepted the still warm eggs and started shovelling them into his mouth. Dean shook his head a little and smiled at his brother. Maybe Sam was only eight years old but he ate like a teen. And he grew like one too. If Dean didn’t start growing faster, Sam would pass him in a few years. A grunt came from the couch where John had changed his sleeping position and reminded Dean to be quiet. That’s why Dean sat down at the chair opposite Sam’s and looked at the mess he had made. A small inaudible groan came from Dean’s mouth. 

Sam slowly stopped eating as he felt more and more full. He ended up sitting with the fork, mixing it all up. He rested his head in his hand and came with a small sigh. “Dean” he asked, still looking at the smashed eggs.

“Yeah?” Dean asked.

“How come we never do anything when we’re here?” Sam’s eyes lifted them up to meet Dean’s. Big and innocent they sent Dean the purest puppy dog look, and Dean immediately knew what Sam was on about. 

“Forget it” Dean answered, looking away so he wouldn’t walk right into Sam’s trap. 

“What?” Sam asked dumbly and innocent. Trying his best to win Dean over to his side. 

“You’re on to something. I know it” 

“Come on Dean. We never leave the house and dad’s sleeping anyway!” Sam exclaimed. Dean hushed at him as John came with a bigger grunt. 

“That’s why we’re only here every other weekend, Sammy” Sarcastic Dean sent his little brother a look. He really didn’t want to get in to trouble and doing something stupid Sam came up with was a sure way of getting it. 

“But, we’ll only be gone for half an hour. I promise Dean, dad will never know!” Sam’s little voice got higher and higher while he leaned forward. His eyes were getting bigger it seemed and Dean really had a hard time withholding his position. 

Dean looked at Sam one extra time and he really didn’t want to disappoint that hopeful face. “Fine! I swear, if I get arrested some day because of you I will sue your ass” Dean breathed as he got up from the chair and took his jacket. Sam jumped up from his chair and forgot all about breakfast as he left his unfinished eggs at the table. 

Now, if Dean had been just a few years older, they could’ve taken John’s car but, unfortunately they had to settle with taking the bus. On such Sunday mornings the world still seems asleep. Most people were probably attending some church organisation or cleaning their cars. None of them had the time to take the bus. And those who did, was the town’s drunks; sweating, smelling and stewing in their own farts. Dean couldn’t help but laugh a bit when a guy named George burped half asleep, making himself scared and fully awake again. That was until a few seconds had passed and he rested his head against the window once again. 

Sam wondered how the world could seem so quiet and timeless. How could the bus have influence on time? How could the world seem so far away from the other side of the windows? And, what was it that made him love it? 

Dean stood up when they got close to the end station and pulled Sam out of his thoughts. From the bus station there was a small ten-minute walk to the nearest forest. Dean led the way over to the abandoned post office on the opposite side of the bus station. Behind the post office there was a small hole through a hedge, which took the two boys to a small path. Dean knew that if they followed it to the right they would end up at the more expensive part of town, while if they turned left they would end up at the most beautiful place he’d ever seen. 

Sam followed Dean gullibly. The path was surrounded by big tall hedges only cut off when a road had to connect with the path. There was no people at all; and it felt as if Sam and Dean really were the last people on earth. Dean’s mind was quick to start his own hero story in his head. Dean imagined how the apocalypse was upon the world and only him and Sam could save it. He then proceeded to imagine a very intense fight scene between him and three brain-thirsty zombies. He then started to think if maybe him and Sam was caught in some big maze and was running in circles, because the forest should have appeared by now.

Sam tried to ask if something was wrong when Dean started to walk more slow and looked back over his shoulder with a worried look. Dean tried to brush it off and told Sam that of course everything was fine, he was just checking if John had followed them. And, just when Dean had lost all hope at finding the damn forest, a small gap revealed some unnoticed track in between some bushes. Dean smiled when they finally arrived where he had planned. A small lake was unfolding at the bottom of a small slope surrounded by tall trees. Grass that was higher than Dean’s knees tickled his legs as he moved forward, down to the bench that was placed a few meters from the lake. Dean had been there before, but just alone and it was actually nice to finally share this experience with someone. He looked over at his little brother and saw how Sam seemed to enjoy the place.  
“Wow, this is amazing. Thank you, Dean” Sam said with his eyes locked at the lake. Dean smiled proudly.

“No problem, Sammy” He put himself on the dry grass and closed his eyes with his hand behind his head. The sun hit his face and he could feel it; almost like it tickled his eyelids and lips. He could feel his cheeks turn more red. Dean kept his ears on Sam to make sure he didn’t come to close to the water. But, all he could hear was the birds in the trees surrounding them and the wind in the grass. That was until he heard a deep, fainted voice; as if the wind took the sound with it.

“I love the nature” was what Dean thought he heard. The voice had been way too deep to fit Sam and John wasn’t around, so Dean sat confused up. But, no one except Sam was in sight. 

Dean shrug and thought that maybe he had been half asleep and was dreaming or something. When Dean looked to the side as he got down on his back again he was sure he saw something though. He still didn’t know if he was dreaming or what was happening, but he was fairly certain that he just saw a hand pick up a lady bug. He was able to see through the hand and he couldn’t see where the hand ended, it just kind of did. The ladybug walked easily over the knuckles and Dean spotted that it was a grownups hand. He kept starring mesmerising at the ladybug and when the ladybug finally flew away, the hand disappeared.


	3. Joyless January

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So yes, a long time ago since I last pulished... I am sorry.  
> But, I've been trying to make the chapters longer, and I've been working with my english so hopefully I don't make that many errors anymore... aha ':P 
> 
> Please, enjoy this chapter and let me know what you think down in the comments!  
> Thank you <3

 

**A week after New Year's Eve.**

Castiel was sitting in his living room, eating noodles from a plastic cup. He had no television instead he owned two big book shelves, which contained all the books Cas had ever read. He gazed from the ruined cover of ‘Oliver Twist’ to ‘Gone with the Wind’ and landed on ‘To Kill a Mockingbird’. And, right on the bottom of the right shelve was his own creation. His own book. He had a hard time understanding that he really had a book running around in stores, being sold to strangers. People he met on the street had the possibility to read his book. 

A week was gone since New Year’s Eve and Cas couldn’t help but counting the days. Around the time it was a year ago since Dean had the accident, a small hope had started to rise in Castiel’s chest. Unconsciously he had thought that maybe it was now Dean would finally wake up. Cas had heard the doctors when they had told him about patients who stayed in coma for over decades but, Castiel had just never realized that they were smoothly trying to show Cas how that could become Dean’s destiny as well. 

Cas got a lump in his throat when he looked around his apartment and realized how empty it was. It was missing something. Something bright and something fun. Castiel was boring and sad, and he could start to see that in the apartment. The dishes were as the size of a mountain and dead plants was placed all around on the window ledges. Castiel shook his head and looked down at his cup of noodles. He needed to get out. But, at the same time he didn’t really fancy watching people walking around being happy. 

However, before Cas could eat another spoonful of noodles his phone rang, loud and annoying. With a deep sigh Castiel got up from the sofa and walked over to the counter, where the phone was laid. A shock of adrenaline went through his body when he found out who was calling. The name Martin Bang was lighting up the screen. Cas threw a look upon his watch and realized that he should have been at Martin’s office five minutes ago.

Castiel jumped from the counter and over to the sink, where he threw the ball of noodles. It landed with a big splash and some of it even hit the window above. But, Cas did not have the time to concern about that, instead he kicked off his sleeping trousers and ran in to his bedroom and found a pair of jeans, which he quickly and clumsy got on. He looked down at his oversized Christmas sweater and decided that it was almost appropriate for a meeting with Martin. So, as the last thing, Cas got his boots and coat on and locked his door, before he ran down the stairs and on to the parking lot. 

This was also the reason as to why Castiel was sitting in a fine, whiskey-smelling office in front of a big mahogany desk, out of breath. Small pearls of sweat were collecting on his forehead and he wiped them away with his sleeves as soon as they started to travel down his face. A small, chubby man with a bald head, which shined more than Castiels sweaty one, was sending not-so-happy faces. He was sitting in a way too big leather chair, and it almost looked like he didn’t have any neck because of the double chins he got, when he looked down. Martin was not thrilled to see Castiel forty minutes late. 

“So…” Martin started out with before he leaned forward and rested his hands at the desk, folded. More silence followed and Cas could feel his own heartbeat speeding up. “Look, Castiel, you’re a great writer, you really are…” Cas got the urge to jump out of the window behind Martin. “But, we can’t keep going like this”. Martin sighed and looked with serious eyes at Castiel. Cas nodded furiously and hoped that his enthusiasm and courage would maybe make Martin change his mind. 

“You really need to keep track of the deadlines, okay? It’s important” Martin explained. Castiel nodded again. And, again as furiously as before.

“I really like your book, Castiel, okay? You’re lucky you got me hooked on your story or else I wouldn’t be giving you a second chance” Castiel could almost feel the weight of a boulder get removed from his shoulders. Cas knew that he had been slacking off with his book but, he had just been unable to find the motivation to keep writing. 

“Give me a new chapter by the end of this week or you have to find another publisher, understand?” Martin gave Castiel a nod and wrinkled his face in a serious way. Cas couldn’t do anything but to nod in agreement and thank Mr. Bang for his second chance. Castiel left the building with a new pressure added to his shoulders. He stood outside of the building for a couple of minutes, just re-evaluating his life. How did he end up here? He had always dreamed of becoming an author but, who knew it was so hard and stressful?  
Castiel shook his head as if he could physically shake the bad feelings off of him, before he moved again. He looked at his watch and realized that he had to be at Joey’s Café in five minutes. Luckily enough, Cas could walk there and still be there on time. 

Charlie was sitting outside of the café, when Cas showed up. A ray of sunshine hit her red coloured hair and made it almost light up. A big and wide smile appeared on her lips as she locked her eyes with Castiel’s. Cas could feel himself light up into a smile when she got up from the chair and went to embrace him with a hug. 

“Cas! Oh geez it’s been so long!” she exclaimed loud enough for the café’s guests outside all turned around. 

“Good to see you too” Cas answered and laughed a little. Charlie had always been able to infect Cas with her great mood. They both sat back down at the table, where two cups of coffee and two plates with sandwiches was waiting. Castiel could feel his stomach growl at the sight of food. 

“I ordered without you, hope it’s okay” Charlie said as she pulled the sandwich closer to her, looking at it hungrily. Castiel made a small laugh.

“Yeah, that’s fine” Castiel grabbed the cup and took a big gulp of the hot beverage. “So, how’s it going?” He asked, once he had out the cup down again. 

“Oh, you’ll never believe me but, I got a job at Google!” Her voice got high and once again, some people sitting beside their table turned around, to see what was going on. 

“You’re serious? That’s great, Charlie” Charlie’s smile was still on her face but, she didn’t seem to be that happy about her new job. 

“Yeah, it’s great. Like, of course it’s not what I was dreaming about but, I guess I can make it work” 

“Oh” Cas answered. He thought Charlie had finally got the job of her dreams but, apparently not. 

“So, what about you, Cas?” Charlie changed the topic, not wanting to make the mood weird. Cas shrugged and looked down at his coffee, still wearing a small smile though.

“Same old. I live a much more boring life than yours” He joked and took a bite from his sandwich. Charlie laughed sarcastically. 

“As if! I’m not the one who’s published a book AND have it running around at conventions and such!” She pointed out. Cas smiled a little. He did go to conventions to meet those who have read his book and he also had to admit, that maybe that was one of the best things about his job. Besides, if he had never gone to those conventions he would never have met Charlie in the first place. 

“What about Dean?” Charlie asked. She didn’t lower her voice or get that pitying expression, instead she kept her voice normal and took a sip of her coffee as if it was just a normal thing to talk about. And, Castiel loved that she did it. He loved how easy it was to talk to Charlie about those things and how she didn’t look down at him or judged him. Instead, she was there for Castiel and supported all of his decision – well, as long as they were reasonable and not stupid – but, Castiel had never had a friend who was like Charlie. 

“Also same old. The doctors are complimenting his great health. They think it’s unusual that he hasn’t been more ill than he has” Charlie was listening very carefully. She knew that Cas maybe looked like the topic didn’t bother him, but he was just getting great at putting up a façade. 

“What about the doctors?” she leaned forward and rested her head in her hands, looking dreamingly and suspicious at Cas. 

“What about them?” asked Cas and looked confused. 

“Any hotties?” Charlie got a big grin on her face and lifted her eyebrows up and down, looking very seductively at Cas. Castiel laughed though.

“No, there really aren’t” 

“Oh, what about that doctor or nurse or whatever, who checks up on Dean? Last time I saw him, I would’ve gone straight for him” Charlie joked. 

Another thing Cas loved about Charlie was how open she was about her sexuality. He had always been keeping himself in the closet in fear of what his brothers would say, but Charlie was never afraid of being gay in front of anyone. 

“It really is nothing. He checks up on Dean and that’s it” Castiel was still smiling a bit, but he got a lump filled with guilt stuck in his stomach. He didn’t like to check out or even think about other guys when Dean was laying in the hospital. It just seemed wrong. 

Charlie got quiet and was instead of talking, sitting and looking at Cas. She had a pensively look on her face. 

“What?” Castiel asked when the tension got too much.

Charlie shook her head and laughed a little before she talked. “It’s just… Cas, you know that people won’t judge you if you move on, right?” Her voice was so sincere and full of support and love that Castiel’s lump of guilt in his stomach travelled up into his throat where it sat and was threatening with starting the tears. 

“Charlie… I can’t…” Castiel thought about what he should say. “I can’t… I… just can’t” tears were starting to pop up in the corner of his eyes, and Castiel, being so full of pride, refused to sit outside of a café and cry. So, he grabbed his jacket and pulled out his wallet. 

“Thank you so much for lunch Charlie. How much do I owe you?” He grabbed some money. “Never mind, I’ll just pay for all of it” Castiel was feeling so confused and out of it that he didn’t notice that Charlie was standing up too.

“Cas I’m sorry, I didn’t want to ruin the mood. Can’t you stay just a little longer?” She seemed hurt but, Cas just had to get away. 

“Call me later, okay?” He said when he quickly hugged her goodbye. 

Sitting alone outside of a café, surrounded by the last snow of January, was Charlie. She looked at the back of Cas which quickly was gone within the mass of people walking up and down, trying to reach enough stores before they close. Maybe, he just needed a little more time, she thought. Maybe, he would one day actually get over all the crap he had been through. Maybe, just one day…


	4. Only an Ankle-biter

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello y'all!  
> Are you exited for season 12 coming in almost only a week!!  
> I am so freaking ready!
> 
> Again, thanks for all the kudos and comments - it really warms my heart and makes me smile so much when I see that someone commented on my story! <3  
> Please, enjoy this chapter and know that I am already working on the next, so hopefully it wont be that long before it comes up :DD
> 
> Love you all!

**Fall of '94**

Dean threw a look at his watch. He had to be at Lisa’s house in fifteen minutes and he hadn’t even gone out of bed yet. He rolled his eyes. It wouldn’t hurt if he was just five minutes late. He laid back against his pillow and picked up his Sony GV-8 Video Walkman. Maybe it was a little old but, Dean had kept it in a great shape. He got it five years ago, when it was the new thing everyone talked about. Unfortunately, the Winchester family had hit a bump in their economy and suddenly they didn’t have that many money. Dean remembered how devastated Mary was when John died. It also still hurt Dean to think about. After all, it was only a year ago it happened. But, not only did the death of John cut a hole in the small family’s members’ hearts but, also in its budget. 

Dean shook his head in an attempt to shake off the bad thoughts. He had a date. And, she was really pretty. And, all his friends thought that they had to go out with each other because they would look cute together. So, Dean really couldn’t see why he actually didn’t feel like going tonight. Maybe, it was just some weird kind of nervousness. Nevertheless, Dean didn’t care. 

Another ten minutes went before Dean finally got off the bed and in to his boots and leather jacket. He wished that he could just take the Impala but, Mary would ground him for a year, if not more, if she found out. Luckily enough, Lisa lived only one street away. 

“Where are you going?” asked a curious eleven-year-old Sam, who caught Dean at the door. 

“Out” answered Dean, who suddenly didn’t have the time for a chat.

“Does mom know?” Sam asked. Dean sighed at his irritating little brother.

“Yes, of course she knows” Dean shut the door before Sam could ask any more questions. Of course, Dean liked his little brother’s company but, sometimes he could be a little too much. And other times, he was straight up just a pain in the ass. But, even though Dean would never admit it, he was deep inside grateful of his little brother’s interest in him. He also knew that without Sam, John’s death would have been a lot harder to go through. 

Dean arrived at Lisa’s door only ten minutes late. He stood outside their front door and just looked at it. He realized how calm he was. Of course, he hadn’t been expecting to be so nervous that he was shaking or crying but, right now he wasn’t nervous at all. His heart rate was normal, his breathing pattern was normal, his hands was as still as a sniper’s. He took a deep breath and prepared himself mentally for the night that was about to come. If only he could shake this weird feeling off, it would all go much smoother.  
Dean knocked the door twice and waited a couple of seconds before he heard footsteps nearing it. A big silhouette rose above Dean and he almost got dizzy when he looked up at the head, flying high above his own. 

“Hi there, I’m Mr. Wood. You must be Dean?” the man answered before he smiled and stretched out a hand. Dean shook the hand, while he tried not to make a grimace of the pain the big hand left him with. 

“Just a second. I think Lisa is almost ready” the man winked before he turned his back to Dean and yelled: “Lisa, your friend is here!” Dean stood there awkwardly. He didn’t really know what to do. So when the man turned his face back to Dean, Dean just put on a big smile and tried to seem as polite as possible.

“So, Lisa tells me you’re from her school?” he more asked than stated. Dean nodded.

“Yes, sir” 

“And, how old are you then?” Mr. Wood asked, wrinkling his brows. Dean knew which speech was coming. His own mom gave him one this noon. The speech about how she didn’t even know what boys were until she was twenty years old and, that Dean was way too young to go around and ask girls out. 

“Fifteen” Dean answered, looking Mr. Wood straight in the eyes. Screw respect for the elders or trying to seem polite. If Mr. Wood was as horrible as his own mom, Dean simply couldn’t care less about proper manners. 

Mr. Wood could feel Dean’s defiant attitude make its way to the surface. “Is that so. Remarkable, isn’t it? When I was your age I didn’t even know what girls were. It’s funny how the times have changed” Dean delivered a fake laugh when Lisa finally showed up behind her dad. 

“Hey Dean!” Her blue eyes met his, and he noticed how he cheeks were red and puffed. She must’ve hurried. Dean smiled at her, not knowing whether to hug her or just awkwardly wave since her dad was still starring at them. 

“Okay dad, see you” Lisa said before she gave him a hug and a kiss on the cheek. They quickly arranged where and when Lisa’s dad had to pick her up and, in return they got a very detailed list of rules they shouldn’t even think of breaking. When the front door finally closed behind them, Dean felt like he could actually breathe again and went for a big gulp of air. 

The walk to the cinema was nice. The weather had just started to get colder and the days was slowly getting shorter. But, not all the leaves had changed colour yet. There were still green leaves hanging from the branches which covered the sidewalk Dean and Lisa was walking on. When they finally arrived Dean had already grabbed her hand. Dean had picked out the movie so all Lisa had to do was picking out her favourite candy before they went in. Dean would maybe never even consider saying it out loud but, he was quite the romantic kind of guy. He had picked a really cheesy and romantic movie which he knew Lisa would enjoy. On top of that he had chosen a small café nearby where they could sit and have some food before Lisa got picked up. 

It wasn’t until they were both sitting in their chairs and the intro to the movie started that Dean realised something was missing. He didn’t know what was missing but, he got this crazy feeling as if he was missing something as important as his arm. Even though he still didn’t know what was missing he started panicking while going through his different pockets. There was nothing but the tickets for the movie in his pockets in his jacket so when he also couldn’t find anything in his jeans’ pockets, he didn’t know what to do. He leaned back in to his chair and tried to relax. And it went pretty well for almost half of the movie. Until Dean couldn’t handle this nagging feeling anymore. He excused himself to the bathroom and as soon as he was out of any risk of getting seen, he took a big sigh. He went through all of his pockets one more time and once again, he couldn’t find anything that was missing. 

He made a quick spin to look behind him as he felt someone’s presence there but, there were none. The hallway he had found himself in was besides Dean completely empty. Dean wasn’t crazy and he wasn’t going to be crazy. Sammy and Mary needed him. Therefore, buried his hands in his leather jacket’s pockets and went in to watch the rest of the movie with Lisa. 

“Are you okay?” she asked. Dean just shook his head and gave her a small forced smile before he nodded. 

When the movie was done and Lisa had gotten rid of all the tears it had caused, they tried to get out of the crowded movie theatre so they could have as much time as possible in the café across the street. Lisa ordered a milkshake while Dean was feeling hungry and got a cheeseburger with a side of bacon. The waiter collected their orders and finally they had some alone time. Lisa started out by saying how incredible the movie was and how amazing the actors was. Dean agreed and waited hungrily for the food. He tried to keep his mind clear and listen to what Lisa had to say but, it just seemed that he couldn’t. Even though he had tried throughout the rest of the movie he had still not been able to shake that bad feeling off him. Hopefully some great food could help.

It wasn’t until the waiter came back, that Dean started seriously doubting if he was crazy. He could see that the waiter had a badge which said his name was Jonathan. Besides, Jonathan was big and kind of buff so when Dean heard a bright voice saying: “my name is Jeff and I’ll be right back with the menus!” he couldn’t quite believe the voice belonged to Jonathan.


End file.
